All You Gotta Do Is Say Yes

23 05 2012

While listening to “Say Yes” by Floetry a thought hit me…my mind wanders in funny tangets sometimes towards clarity.

In the video the lady is writing about how the guy makes her feel and the man was drawing a picture of her.  Both in seperate seats, both thinking about each other.

The Chorus of the song goes:

“All you gotta do is say yes

Don’t deny what you feel let me undress you baby

Open up your mind just rest

I’m about to let you know you make me…”

Aside from the sexual reference the clarity that came to me was “Fill your mind with what you want/desire”.  Of late my brain has been on a downward spiral of what I don’t have (no job, no personal income, no stability, no whatever).  I have filled my brain with stress, sorrow, depression.

Last night lying in bed with Master I felt incredibly tired holding on to this stuff.

For self preservation I need to fill my head with better stuff.

“First keep the peace within yourself, then you can also bring peace to others.”

Thomas a Kempis1420
German mystic & religious author (1380 – 1471)

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Service Book of Days 5/3/10

3 05 2010

v Outside my window… (weather, what do you hear, what do you see?) is darkness.  It was very rainy and muggy today.

v my thoughts… are focused on finding us a place to live.

v Today’s Quote: Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.

Albert Camus, French existentialist author & philosopher (1913 – 1960)

I can totally dig this quote.  Sometimes it is a lot of work to go to work or be around people who I can’t really be myself with.  I am not talking about in terms of my relationship with Master but just being myself.    It feels like energy being uselessly wasted and I limit my time with those people as much as necessary.  I feel at this point in my life, I don’t have to give energy to people who don’t really want to be around me.

v i am thankful for…air conditioning because of this weekend was any indication of spring…it is going to be very yucky in NJ.

v From my service training…(any skills, training etc; notes you want to share this week) So Master came to visit me last week.  It was a great visit.  I really, really love just being around him but with our moving in the same state getting closer and closer the “buffer” is getting less an less.

v From the kitchen…(menu for the week, what are you cooking?)  Nothing new this week.

v i am wearing… blue tank top and blue shorts.

v i am creating…(crafts, sewing etc;)  nothing new  at the moment.

v my adventures this week…(where are you going this week?)  No adventures.

v Becoming well read…(What are you reading this week?)  Listening to my podcasts.   I just downloaded an audible book recommeneded by one of the people Master listens to on his podcasts.  The book is called Daemon by Daniel Suarez.  It gives a “what if” scenario on what would happen if someone decided to take over our lives using technology.

v i manifest and co-create…(what are your hopes, dreams, and prayers this week)

v Today’s Melody…(what music are you listening to? even if it’s just the sound of a bird…) No music today.

v One of my favorite things…daydreaming.

v further plans for this week…Nothing this week.   Keeping it close to home.

v Still….life(share a picture you’ve taken OR a picture you found online that speaks to you)  Photo used with permission from:

Want to start something different.  Here are the directions:

Once a week on Monday you will respond to the above prompts.. more is better. Post your response on your blog or website.

Mention the blog (service savoir faire) and offer a link back to the main page of the blog. This way others can participate in the project as well!   www.servicesavoirfaire.blogspot.com

So now that you know how, please feel free to join me. 🙂





Service Book of Days 10/6/09

6 10 2009
  • Outside my window… (weather, what do you hear, what do you see?) you know, I work in a very scenic office building out in the suburbs. Beautiful grounds…all the buildings are designed to fit the surroundings and not over take them. In the winter it is absolutely gorgeous to see the snow falling. Somehow my office building has a cozy feeling to it 🙂
  • my thoughts…are about trying to regain my equilibrium A few things happened a couple of weeks ago that almost made me go back into my hidey whole but I am refusing to do that so I am getting back into action.
  • Today’s Quote…  “Don’t follow your dreams, Chase them”, Richard Dumb.
    I am going to follow my dream of being with Master.  Of changing my kids environment and being happy.
  • i am thankful for…always my family, all my moments – good and bad. I know I keep saying this but these are the things that I am most thankful for…everything else is just gravy, as the saying goes.
  • From my service training…(any skills, training etc; notes you want to share this week)
  • From the kitchen…(menu for the week, what are you cooking?) I am going to make something non-exotic for dinner for my new meal. The kids have told me they need something edible…lol So I am going to roast a chicken but marinade it in a ginger sauce. I am going to cut up and roast some squash for the vegetables. Simple but different 🙂
  • i am wearing…my stinky workout clothes. Oh man, I can’t wait to take a shower and feel all smooth and clean again.
  • i am creating…(crafts, sewing etc;) nothing new at the moment
  • my adventures this week…(where are you going this week?) No adventures this weekend. I am going to continue to do stuff around my house. Still trying to prepare my house for selling. 🙂
  • Becoming well read…(What are you reading this week?)…Nothing this week, but thinking about ordering The Fountainhead by Ayne Rand. I keep hearing stuff about this book and I want to listen to it myself.
  • i manifest and co-create…(what are your hopes, dreams, and prayers this week) Peace and tranquility in my house and with my children. I pray for the people around us to not take their life for granted.
  • Todays Melody..(what music are you listening to? even if it’s just the sound of a bird…) Someone posted a song on their fetlife page that I just love the words to. It is Mary J’s song “You’re All I Need”

Here are some of the words:

Like a sweet morning dew
I took on look at you
And it was plain to see
You were my destiny

  • One of my favorite things…Sing. I am just an undiscovered voice waiting for the producer to hear my voice as I ride the train. Well that is what I tell myself when it is probably more like the people on the train grumbling for me to be quiet…LOL
  • further plans for this week…housecleaning/clearing. Continuing my workout plan. Fixing up my house.
  • Still….life (share a picture you’ve taken OR a picture you found online that speaks to you)

fish and woman

You know I was surfing the site Master gave me to look for pictures that I can use without breaking any copy right laws and such and I saw this picture on the front page.  I was looking  for pictures of nice bright and shiny things that make me feel giggly inside.  But I just kept coming back to this picture.

You know with the move and stuff I feel really scared.  I am basically changing my comforting surroundings for a place unknown.  Starting new.  Looking at this picture, the words that came to my mind were:

Sometimes you just have to eat the whole thing.

I am going to prepare as well as I can for the move but there will come a time soon when I just have to do it.

=============

Photo used by Creative Commons:  http://www.everystockphoto.com/photo.php?imageId=241855&entryId=424

Here are the directions for this post if you are interested in starting your own:

Once a week on Monday you will respond to the above prompts.. more is better. Post your response on your blog or website.

Mention my blog and offer a link back to the main page of my blog. This way others can participate in the project as well! http://servicesavoirfaire.blogspot.com/





SELF Again

8 06 2009

I found an interesting article today that reminds me that SELF (the South-East LeatherFest) is coming up soon.  It is a major BDSM convention in Atlanta, and will be celebrating 25 years of existance this year. While I have only been to the vendor rooms (damn budgeting, I will make it there some day), I hear wonderful things about it.

Southern Voice has a wonderful write up about it. If your going to be in the Atlanta area June 12-14, stop in and check it out.

Celebrating its 25th festival this year and open to all people regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, SELF includes a weekend full of classes, entertainment, parties and role-playing.

Organizers have shifted the schedule so that there is more programming on Friday and less on Sunday, have lowered ticket prices across the board and are offering one-day and vendor fair-only passes.

“We’re a little different this year,” says SELF co-owner Catherine Gross. “Everyone else has had to tighten their belt. We are a community event, why shouldn’t we do the same thing? We know what’s going on with our attendees, everyone has been hit hard… It was the right thing to do, and we did it.”

Last year, a good friend got an award at SELF, this year friends are running for the Master and Slave title.  I wonder what else will happen.

Share your SELF memories, please, in the comments.

MV





Placate

25 08 2008

I learned a new word while spending time with Sir this past week.

Placate:  to appease or pacify, esp. by concessions or conciliatory gestures.

Sir and i were at the AfterGlow event that just closed our experience at BlackBEAT quite nicely.  Sir had mentioned that we would stay for a collaring ceremony which I was happy about because I had never seen a collaring before.  The collaring ceremony was going to start later than expected and Sir came over to me and started to tell me about the change to our plans.  I knew he had a long drive back so instead of letting him finish expressing his thoughts to me, I interrupted him and said it’s okay Sir we can leave whenever you are ready I don’t mind.   That did not go over well and his swift response pointed that out to me. 

I without realizing was trying to placate him.  In my relationship with my ex-husband I would do whatever I could to keep him with me to make him happy at the expense of myself.   I realized that I was doing the same with Sir. That I was trying to show him that I can be pliable and agreeing so that he wouldn’t think that being with me would be such a chore.

You know what that does, it devalues him as a responsible, thinking, caring man.  When I do that to Sir I basically treat him like a little child who does not know nor control his own emotions.    This is not the man I chose to be my Sir.  This is not the man I chose to be a positive influence for my children.   Someone said to me while I was at BlackBEAT that by my not listening or letting Sir finish his thoughts I could quite possibly miss something very important.

So what I have done now that I realized my desire to placate him, I have stopped, mindfully.  I am more aware of my not having to say anything when Sir says something to me.  I am not required to placate him or to fill his head with endless compliments or encouragements.  Before I speak Sir tells me to count to 3 which gives me time to not respond or to respond appropriately.

You know, the more that I am with Sir, the more that I appreciate myself with him.

mvs1esclave





A Haiku?

22 06 2008
I tried to write a haiku…something different.  😀
 

Stretches the morning
Laying still waiting for me
Impending darkness inside

 

 

 

 





Congradulations to NCMaster

16 06 2008

A dear friend of mine won the prestigious Jack Stice Award at this year’s SouthEast Leatherfest. NCMaster has been an upstanding member of the local community and a dear personal friend.

Congratulations. No one deserves it more.

MV








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