And I bet you are asking yourself, who is namaste? Well for one namaste is the slave who mentored my little esclave. But I will let her introduce herself.
slave – namaste has counseled women and taught about embracing submission for over 15 years. She brings this knowledge into her relationship serving as Master Obsidians’ 24/7 TPE slave as well as to counseling and aiding in the development of other slaves in the lifestyle. Her writings on surrender and absolute slavery have been featured on web sites and in books. She is Founder and co-moderator of various lifestyle groups, including one geared specifically for slaves in TPE relationships. She is into Domestic Service, Protocols, Spirituality and The Art of Surrender.
Obsidian and her make a wonderful pair, and have served as an influence for both myself and my slave. I wanted to interview both of them, and namaste had her interview ready first.
1) Who is namaste slave of Master Obsidian?
Wow Sir, what a question! i don’t think i’m easily summed up. i am an archeologist, digging deep within to my core, i find external exploration to be quite tame compared to the things we can uncover within ourselves. i am someone that Master has chosen to take on His Great Adventure called life which has become my adventure as well. There are many facets to me, spiritual, priestess/minister, service oriented slave, His nymph and anguissette. i’m a mother, an artist, a poetess, a writer. i dance naked under the moon, or curl up with a hot cup of tea and a good book. i love to cook and entertain guests. i’m a succulent, exuberant, utterly feminine woman… but most of all i am His.
2) How did you get into the Scene/Lifestyle?
In my ministerial background i would always lean towards the “wives obey your Husbands” end of things. i taught it, preached it, mentored women on how to do it. i realized that this was something that seemed to come more naturally for me than for my peers. Intimately i found myself always wanting to be in the submissive role. For the longest time i thought something was wrong with me, the things i desired and longed for were definitely out of alignment with my conservative upbringing. Over a period of years a number of things happened. my faith changed, my husband and i separated (and eventually divorced) and i had a few encounters with various facets of this lifestyle through my online browsing. The first was stumbling upon a Gorean website – which fascinated me…i thought “it’s my fantasies come to life!!”. Another experience was having a Dominant contact me at random and say He thought i might be a submissive. At this time i had no idea what this meant. i went off in search of some information and boy did i find it! i ended up meeting with some real people through the online medium, finding some groups ( i was lucky from some of the stories i hear!) and the rest is history.
3) What are you most proud of? i
am proud that at some point i stopped living my life in fear. i realized that many of the decisions i was making were based in fear. Fear of G-d. Fear of disappointing those around me. Fear of making a mistake. Fear of failure. When i relinquished my attachment to the fear -which had been a constant companion for so long i didn’t even recognize it as fear anymore- i became able to live my life as my Truest self. i stopped seeing the Creator as a huge being who viewed me with disapproval. Instead i saw myself as truly fearfully and wonderfully made, including my desire to live my life enslaved to Another. i stopped trying to make myself fit into a box. i relinquished people and relationships that didn’t nurture my core or inspire my greatness. i chose to end a marriage of over 10 years that was slowly eroding my spirit and walked away from the toxic relationships i had with certain family members. i gave myself permission to fly, because there’s no reason to be afraid of heights when you have wings.
4) What should we be teaching?
i believe we should teach more relationship. It seems that we teach a great deal of S/M Technique oriented things, to a point where for many people S/M is the same as D/s or M/s. The reality is that one can have one without the other. It is sad also many how many people jump feet first into the deep end of the pond without understanding relationship dynamics. Even in the vanilla world while people are taught sex ed, no one is taught relationship ed. i’d like to see more classes on communication, conflict resolution, polyamory, long term relationship building etc; but all within the power exchange dynamic. We do have classes that teach these things currently, but typically they are taught from an egalitarian perspective.
5) What is important?
Honesty and living your truth is important. But more foundational than that is knowledge of self, for how can you be honest or live your truth if you don’t know who you are? Making the time to get quiet and alone with yourself and (to quote something i once read) investigate your dark places with a flash light, is so vital to being conscious and deliberate as you go through life and Leather. In this community i see people grabbing titles, collars and orientations without knowing anything about them. Are we so desperate to identify as SOMETHING that we grasp at whatever seems to be in? Or, are we so lacking in understanding of who we are that we look for a label so that we can have a prescribed way of being? The titles, the collars, the orientation labels are only descriptors of what currently is. They are not Creators of what isn’t. Do we need affirmation and identity so greatly that we feel that we are made more than what we are by being called – slave, Master, masochist, queer, gay, Leather, not-Leather, Kink? i think in our lifestyle we have a bit of a paradox. On one hand we are counter culture, individuals…some would say anarchists. On the other… we are a community of orphans seeking family. We (because of what we are) don’t feel accepted by Vanilla society, and yet many of us feel no acceptance within the gates of our Leather lifestyle either. We want connection, we want to be loved, we want to be embraced, not merely tolerated. All of which is to say that i believe an equally important facet of this is Tribe. Find those who are your family, whose souls you connect with and who share with you Principles, Ethics, Integrity, Honor – Vision. Join with them and form Intentional Community. We are stronger this way i believe, when we welcome those who we know are part of us and let them know they are not alone.