Attention California: A Call to Action by the NCSF

6 04 2011

I saw this today, and I thought I would pass it along. From the NCSF website.

Action Alert – Take Action Californians!

Our BDSM communities could be adversely impacted by a well-intentioned, but overly broad, piece of proposed criminal legislation that has been introduced by Senator Christine Kehoe in the California Senate.  NCSF is asking all of you to sign and send to NCSF letters (a draft is attached below) that we can introduce if necessary at a hearing likely to be held in April, 2011.

The purpose of the bill, SB 430, is to permit effective prosecution of strangulation or suffocation “in domestic violence, sexual assault, child abuse and elder abuse cases.” But the bill’s application could go far beyond those situations and result in felony prosecutions for use of hoods, gags and the like in BDSM play. There would be no requirement of “an intent to kill or injure,” or of “visible injuries,” and there is no mention of consent as a defense.

NCSF has been in touch with Senator Kehoe’s staff, which has seemed sympathetic, and has proposed modifications of the bill’s language that would address our concerns.  Now we need to follow up by presenting at the hearing as many letters as possible that support the goal of prosecuting domestic violence, but only if language is inserted that protects our communities.

We urge you to sign the attached letter, modified as you see fit, and send it back to NCSF.

National Coalition for Sexual Freedom

822 Guilford Avenue, Box 127

Baltimore, MD 21202-3707

Dear NCSF:

I fully support the worthy goal of Senator Kehoe’s proposed legislation, to ensure that strangulation and suffocation can be effectively prosecuted in cases of domestic violence, sexual assault, child abuse and elder abuse. But I am very concerned that SB 430 as now worded might be used to prosecute elements of non-harmful, consensual BDSM (Bondage, Domination/submission, Sadomasochism) activity between adults, such as the use of gags or hoods. This could subject millions of tax paying, law-abiding Americans to criminal prosecution, merely for engaging in erotic, mutually pleasurable conduct.

Therefore I and thousands of other Californians would be able to support this otherwise valuable legislation only if it is modified by specifically excluding non-assault activities.

I join you in urging Senator Kehoe to incorporate in this bill the language NCSF has proposed.

Sincerely,

Your Name

Your Address (with ZIP CODE)

Date

Take action that you feel appropriate.

MV





Master Void on Consent

15 09 2010
Martin Van Maele - La Grande Danse macabre des...

Image via Wikipedia

My Google reader had two interesting articles in it about consent and the law today. One happened in Australia, the other in Sweden. Both involve a man being aggressive to a woman. Both are kind of complex situations. The Australian one involves a man and his ex-wife/former submissive. The other involves a 32 year old man and a 16 year old woman.

BDSM is what we all are claiming to practice. But in truth, BDSM requires consent. My esclave consents to what I do with and to her.  She can have me stop at any time. But the other two went too far.  In Australia, consent seems very clearly to have been withdrawn.  A restraining order was even issued. She was with another Dominant. Relationship should have been over. Without consent, BDSM becomes abuse.

In Sweden, the issue revolves around the issues of consent and age. Can a 16 year old (with a history of self abuse if the article is accurate) consent to Sadomasochistic activities? Did her partner take advantage of her? It is hard to say. I don’t think so. Even if she is above the age of consent in Sweden, the brain is still developing at that age. No, I think such things are wrong.

There is no checklist to see if your relationship is abuse in a BDSM context. There are many, many relationships that would complete any checklist.  But there is one word that sums up the difference between abuse and fun.

Consent.

If you aren’t consenting to your lover’s curent activities, or you have been so abuse you can no longer not consent, please get help.

Otherwise, keep on having fun.

Let me know what you think, in the comments please.

MV





A Death in the Family

18 08 2010

Used under a creative common licence. Click on pic for details.

I was going to make a lite humorous post today, relating to some steampunk sex toys. That isn’t to be. Instead, I want to tell you about a friend of mine. Darque DeSade.

Darque was a photographer and artist living in New York. We met through our times at BlackBEAT. He was a character. I could always count on him to bring a smile to my face. As the years went, I would see him at events in DC, and even on occasion in NYC.

When my girl and I were getting together, I expressed an interest in his work, she bought me one of his prints. It is hanging today in my home, above the mantel in my bed room.  One of the few pieces of art I own that isn’t from my own efforts, or my family.

When his first book came out, we were all happy for him.  I hated that i couldn’t make it to NYC for his second book.

Yesterday I got word that Darque DeSade was with us no more. It was a shock to hear that I would never see him again. The pain that he suffered through for so long is now over.

Rest in peace My Brother. You will be missed

MV





LA Dungeon Scene of Murder and Fire

4 08 2010

I found out about this disturbing news this weekend. While it is scene related, I think it is more of a case of work place violence.  Basically, it seems that the alleged murderer was fired from the club earlier, then came back, shot the owner in the head and set fire to the club.

It has been a while since I have read anything this bad involving the scene. You can read more about it here and here.

From LA Weekly Blogs:

Fifty-three-year-old David Edward Albert of Simi Valley was expected to be in court in Inglewood Thursday afternoon for his arraignment. He faces charges of murder, arson and animal cruelty. The body of the owner’s dog was also found in the building.

Prosecutors allege that the suspect shot John Lavine, owner of the Passive Arts bondage club, several times in the head before sparking the blaze at the La Cienega Boulevard building in the city of Lennox.

Authorities said Albert was found hiding in bushes across the street from the smoldering venue Tuesday morning. He was bleeding, and he said he had been hit by a car. But deputies didn’t buy it and placed him under arrested.

MV





Learning to Love From Lesbians

24 03 2010

I found 2 stories in the news this week about lesbians.  The first is about a judge ruling about an 18 year old woman who wanted to take her girlfriend to the prom. He said that it was a violation of her rights to cancel the prom.  While he isn’t going to re-instate the prom (mainly due to a competing private prom), it is still a major victory.  In the USAToday:

A federal judge ruled Tuesday that the Itawamba County, Miss., school board violated the rights of a lesbian student by canceling the prom when the student challenged a ban on same-sex dates, but the judge stopped short of ordering the district to reinstate the April 2 prom.U.S. District Court Judge Glen Davidson said he denied the injunction request because a private prom parents are planning will serve the same purpose as the school prom and because “requiring defendants to step back into a sponsorship role at this late date would only confuse and confound the community on the issue.”

I was disturbed when I read initially about this story. Fortunately the judge ruled correctly in this case, and hopefully this precedent will prevent things like this from happening in the future.

The second story is about learning to love you women by listening to lesbians.  This is in AskMen.com in their article “Top 10 Lesbian Sex Secrets”. I do like the idea that we can learn from lesbians about how to make love to women. Makes sense.  Some of my Favorites are”

Don’t just thrust away

The term “screwing” is actually ancient. It comes from the Taoist technique of literally screwing with your hips during intercourse. Using a horizontal figure-eight motion (the infinity symbol), this technique can help you reach all of those elusive vaginal hot spots during sex, which is usually tough to do. You may also want to try to alternate between short, shallow thrusts — highly stimulating for you both — and long deep thrusts, which fill her up while calming you down, so you can last longer. The Taoists used to write about the perfect sexual encounter as 30 minutes of female arousal followed by 1,000 loving thrusts. Now there’s a workout goal!

Play with toys and sexual enhancements

This blends in beautifully with the previous tip, as many women have difficulty climaxing without the use of a toy, or have even stronger orgasms with them. Toys today are for everyone — men, women and for use together. If she gets to control the speed and pressure, she’ll consider them a natural part of lovemaking. If you use a cock ring with a vibrating bullet, have her on top of you so she can move around until the bullet hits her clitoris where she enjoys it.

Compliment her on her genitalia

For most women, the thought of anyone looking at us “down there” is loaded with hesitation and fear. Even if you’ve been together for a long time, women are always concerned with how we look, smell and taste. If you want to release the wild woman inside her, fill her with confidence about her body. Tell her often how beautiful she is, and how glorious she smells and tastes.

Ok, that last one was a bit awkwardly written, at least the title was. LOL.

I hope you found the above interesting and/or useful.

MV





International Master and slave 2010 Announced

3 03 2010

This past weekend saw the South Plains Leatherfest, International Master/slave Weekend, come and go. Two friends of mine won the International Master/slave competition. Congratulations (again) to Master Obsidian and slave namaste. For those of you unaware of the significance of this, I found this on the event’s web site.

The Owners/Producers of the International Master/slave Contest are committed to providing the leather/SM and Master/slave communities with an International Master and an International slave who will represent the M/s lifestyle with integrity and competence. The holders of the International Master and International slave titles will be seen as spokespersons for the Master/slave community, and as such, one of the most important attributes of the titleholders should be the ability to clearly and effectively communicate what it means to them to live and identify as Master and slave.

It is expected that the holders of the titles will take every opportunity to educate the leather/SM and M/s communities on the Master/slave lifestyle, and will actively seek out venues that will allow them to speak on Master/slave issues, whether that be through speeches, seminar presentations, participation on panel discussions, writing articles, etc.

The International Master and slave titles are not about a particular “look,” dress, body type, gender or sexual orientation. There is no required set of protocols that the International Master and slave are expected to follow.

Contestants at the International Master/slave Contest have competed at and won one of the regional Master/slave contests certified as official feeder contests by International.

Master Obsidian is one of the most in-depth thinkers I have know when it comes to TPE/IE. I have learned quite a bit reading his words and look forward to learning more.  Slave namaste was the mentor of my girl. She is an amazing person, who exudes grace, poise and spirituality.

Now to persuade CAPEX to bring them to town.

MV








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